Dating Advice,Mental Health

How to Get Over Someone You Never Dated

If you have ever dated anyone, then you know from personal experience, that when it is time to end the relationship, it can be a hard time for one if not both of you.

It can take time for the serious healing process to start, as you need to focus on what you need to do to help you with moving forward and getting over them in a healthy way, but that can be delayed if you are not able to accept what is happening and spend time with yourself.

Finally getting over an official relationship can seem like a breath of fresh air as you both have probably been able to talk it through together and move on, however, if you are trying to get over someone you never dated, that can be even more difficult as you don’t really have an even ground to stand on.

Why is it so Hard to Get Over Someone You Never Dated?

In this day and age, dating is done a lot differently, we are online more and will use apps to make connections with others.

These aren’t always true connections as they can last for short periods, e.g. talking stages, but when they move a bit further there is some hope that they can progress into something more fruitful.

However, when those ‘relationships’ look promising only for them to be fully cut off before things can move onto the next stages it can leave people feeling sad as well as a few other things too.

Self-Doubt

When it comes to something ending, it can make you feel self-doubt about who you are and build on your insecurities which can impact other relationships down the line.

Going Over The What-Ifs

You feel bad about what went on and why it happened in the first place.

You can start to think about the what ifs on the matter and how things changed so quickly.

“What if it was me?” “What if I said something wrong?”

All of it can take over your mind and make you feel sad and quite lonely.

No Closure

The lack of closure can drive anyone crazy and make them feel worse about the situation and why it went down.

There was no official relationship so there is nothing for you to go over, it just feels like an empty space, and it can make it even harder if you had strong feelings for them in the first place.

They may have their own reasons for ending it, be it bad timing or their mental health wasn’t great, but if they haven’t told you, how would you even know?

The Loss of Hope For The Future

If you were getting on with someone really well and you, in your own way, started thinking about the future and what life will be like, and they then went cold turkey and cut it off, that can make you feel at a loss.

There was hope for what could have been, but now you have nothing to cling on to.

You thought that they were your ideal partner, but now they are just someone you used to know.

Tips on Getting Over Someone You Never Dated

Now that you have gone over how it makes you feel, it is time to think about getting over this person you never dated in the first place and see what you can do for yourself so that you don’t spiral or make the same mistakes again in a future relationship.

You can either get over someone you never dated in a few weeks or a few months, and in some respects, depending on the dynamic of the relationship, it can take years, especially if they are someone you have known for a while and it’s been all over the place.

Seek Professional Help

This is a big one and one that might be reserved for a time when you start noticing a pattern with people you date or don’t ‘date’.

If you are aware that you have gone through quite a few talking stages and nearly dating stages only for it to be cut off quickly, it might help you to speak to professionals like a therapist to go over how you feel.

Sometimes, getting a different perspective from another can help you see something you may have missed, plus it can help you build up your self-esteem again, as well as let you feel all your emotions without having to hide them.

It Can Help You

Going to a therapist doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with you or that you need ‘fixing’ when it comes to love, it can just help you work through any issues that you feel are holding you back or taking over your mind when it comes to getting over someone.

If you have a mental illness and are doing your best to work with it to have a fulfilling relationship, stopping a relationship that never happened can make you start second-guessing yourself which may send you on the wrong path, a therapist can help you understand yourself and show that you are not a burden or that you don’t deserve love.

Write Down Everything You Are Feeling

It’s just ended, and you’re upset, angry, fed up, and a whole load of other emotions, now is the time to write it all down.

Get it on paper and unburden that mind of yours from carrying those feelings around with you.

This can not only help your mental health about the situation, but it can be the best medicine for you if you just need to release that built-up tension from the constant ‘whys’ going around your head.

Might be The Best Alternative

Sometimes, when it comes to processing those emotions about someone you never dated, you might find it easier to do this than talking to a family member or good friend, especially if you never told them in the first place as it wasn’t someone you actually dated.

Stay Busy

This can help you from going over and over in your head what happened between you two.

Not everyone has the luxury of talking out their feelings and making space for closure.

Sometimes, one way to get over someone you never dated is to just keep yourself as busy as possible so you don’t go down with your thoughts.

A lot of questions race through your mind and you might start to feel guilty about random things that happened with them.

Cut that off as soon as possible so you don’t make yourself even worse. If you feel like talking to them, try to control yourself or find alternatives.

Talking to a virtual companion similar to Nastia AI, for one, could be a good way to satisfy your urge for conversation. Perhaps it might even help you find closure.

You could also find an activity to do instead whenever your mind goes to them or you feel like calling them up.

Sometimes There Isn’t a Reason

If you had serious feelings for them (love) and they didn’t feel it back or you felt like they didn’t (unrequited love), then this can stop you from trying to piece the reasons why together.

Sometimes there isn’t any reason, it just wasn’t meant to be.

Focus on Self-Love

When you are going through something like this, finding any form of love for yourself can be hard.

You don’t feel loveable and this will affect your mental health a lot because it takes you down into a place where you don’t want to go to.

Find ways that you can build that love back up for yourself again.

This can be talking to your friends and feeling that love from them, or just doing things in your daily life that make you feel good. Additionally, you can explore activities that bring you pleasure and happiness. For instance, you might find enjoyment in following your hobbies, doing self-care practices, or even exploring platforms like live adult cams (listed on portals like Free Cams report), where you can engage in sex chat that can provide a sense of pleasure and connection.

Stop Communicating With Them

You may feel that strong pull to talk to them again, or just drop them a text to see how it is going, but that won’t help you at all.

For one, they may ignore you which can make you feel even worse about the situation, especially if it ended with barely any communication in the first place.

Or, it can pull you back in if they start to talk to you the way they used to.

Things Will Likely Be The Same

Do you really want that? All those feelings you felt before about it ending and not even being a relationship to move forward with are still going to be there.

Have they changed or do you just wish they would so you can get that feeling back you used to have when it first started?

It will scratch your itch for a little bit but that itch will come back and it will be harder to get rid of if you keep going back time and time again.

You won’t be able to move on.

Hang Out With Your Friends

A great way to help you move forward when you need to get over someone you never dated is by hanging out with friends who will make you laugh and just forget your troubles.

They may already know the situation, if you let them know in the first place, so they may be able to help talk you through it or at least get you to express your feelings.

However, if you decided to withhold it from them, your friends can still help you out by keeping your mind and body busy without you needing to divulge what is going on.

They Are The Best Medicine

Your friends are always going to be there for you no matter what, that is why leaning on them can give you that space to breathe and collect your thoughts, or at least make you have some time to just let go and be happy.

Respect Their Choice and Move On

It’s done and over, you know it is.

Do you have closure? Probably not. Are you filled with questions? More than likely.

That’s fine, they made their choice, and bar an explanation from them, you are not going to know exactly why it happened or what prompted them.

It can happen suddenly with no contact or it can die down over time.

It is time for you to move on and just accept that it happened, and whilst you may have liked more from them or that you want to know what was going on in their mind, you just need to set that phone down and move on.

There is Someone Out There For You

It is okay to grieve for what could have been, but after a while, you are just stopping yourself from meeting someone who can give you what you are looking for, or at least, be that person that you feel your authentic self with.

Emotional hurt is painful, but don’t let it stop you from trying again with someone else.

Conclusion

Now that you have read through how to get over someone you never dated, do you feel any better at all?

Maybe you do or you don’t, whatever you are feeling, it’s okay to feel it and work through those emotions, just don’t let them take you down and keep you there.

It didn’t work out, but that doesn’t mean the next one will be the same.

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Carrie Jones

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